Don’t be in such a hurry to say “no” and don’t let your own fantasies get in your way. Here’s what our online dating insider Francine has to say …
If you’ve signed up to date online, you know you have to submit a photo and a profile. Intimidating, huh? So don’t be in such a hurry to reject a potential mate …
PHOTOS: Pay no attention to the man in that picture
I have heard women turn away guys because they did not look appealing in their photo. I myself look much less appealing in 2-dimensions. But men especially don’t pose well for the camera. If you met these guys in person, unless they were horribly deformed, you would react to their animation, sense of humor, sexual energy or other attractive qualities that would far outweigh their looks, which could easily be better in person, anyway. I just heard from a friend to whom I had given this advice. She is now dating a man she would otherwise have rejected, and she thanked me.
WRITING YOUR PROFILE: Be Careful what you wish for
Every website I know of asks you to describe the man you are looking for. Be careful not to let your fantasies drive away good men. I know a woman who described “in daunting detail”her last boyfriend, on whom she was still hung up. She wondered why she got so few responses. Be reasonable, not too generic, but not so demanding that no man could possibly live up to your job description. Many of these give men the willies. Before you post, ask a sensible friend to read what you’ve written.
